Clearing customs…
Every other app on your phone is running a con. They want your email, your number, your contacts, your location at 3 a.m., and the names of everyone you've ever texted. They call it “personalization.” It's a shakedown.
We're not in that business. Your data is yours — keep it, frame it, bury it in the yard. We take exactly two things: a name to call you, and a handle on whatever social you actually use — Instagram, X, TikTok, wherever. That's the whole heist.
And only so we can tap you on the shoulder when a drop clears customs. Want the heads-up? Leave your handle. Don't? Then don't — you'll hear nothing from us and we'll part as friends.
No email. No phone number. No password to forget. No “we've updated our terms.” No pre-checked box built to screw you.
Damn the man. Come get your soda.